i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize