when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
