Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
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