I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm just crazy horny about you
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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