People in love make me want to vomit
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
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