She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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