I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
