Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize