I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize