I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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