so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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