I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
