Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize