we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
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I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
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The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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