the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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