did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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