I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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