So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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