I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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