my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize