Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
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