He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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