No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize