Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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