he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
