Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize