I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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