I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
