batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
