Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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