what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
