And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize