exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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