so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
