i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
