The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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