i may or may not be watching the land before time
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize