the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
