I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize