Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
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