susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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