I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
