it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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