I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
