Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
