I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize