Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
