sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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