why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize