What a fucking waste of an outfit
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
