i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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