He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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